This is the view from the balcony. It has been almost 2 years now since we had moved into that home. My first home out of college, rather, in my life, oops, does that sound mawkish? Well, there isnt any harm doing so once in a while :D (why are blogs there for? eh?? :D ).
One does miss the place one has lived in, that comfort zone, that nook and corner of the room you lived in, the bed you slept on, the level of lighting in the room at different times of the day/season and especially the one when you like the most. I guess am a tad bit more attached to the place i live in.
It was always like that, when we moved form Hyderabad to Anantapur when i was in 2nd class. That trauma haunted me till my 5th class (I can now get over it a bit more faster though ;)! ) and manifested itself as a sort of trepidation over going to school. Before i could settle down, my parents once again had to change the house to someother in the same city. I still remember, precisely the very next day i had my 'unit tests' that too "first" social unit test and it was sunday (when life looks all the more gloomier compared to saturday or friday evening). The emphasis on the first is because, "first unit test" has something new to it i.e, the new class (6th) along with the first and upon that "social", the most dreaded and an abstract intangible subject with no logic and which only could be memorised( not understood) and has no relevance (at the age) what so ever to me. It could have been shown in a better light had my teacher imbued that interest and had i been exposed to the newspaper to understand its relevance to the comtemporary international political predicaments.
Its the same kind of emotional pang which haunted me all my life which still haunts me now at this moment when i think about everything that was happy or sad about me. Happy because it "was" happy(read no longer), sad because it is sad ( and still is ). It reminds me of the days i dreamt that someday it would not be like this and that someday i will be free and things would be in my control. Boringly so, Life always seems to be in somebody elses' control, either your bosses' or your PG owner's or pathetically still, in your roomate's control when she does not even let you switch off the fan or open the window as you wish and does not even pay you a salary or serve food!!! :D
Leaving that aside, about the pic here, it was taken during one of the lazy weekends with my friends with whome i had shared that dwelling and with whome i had been sharing the last 5.5 years(NITW)by then( i.e, when i left Hyderabad and moved to Bangalore Feb 19th 2007).
Leaving that aside, about the pic here, it was taken during one of the lazy weekends with my friends with whome i had shared that dwelling and with whome i had been sharing the last 5.5 years(NITW)by then( i.e, when i left Hyderabad and moved to Bangalore Feb 19th 2007).
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If i write the same piece now , it would look like this :
This is a view from the balcony of one of the houses i lived in.
It was almost 2 years since we had moved into that house, and had by that time, started to feel like "home". My first "home" after college, home away from my parents home, home i grew up in. Does that sound mawkish? Well, there isnt any harm in doing so once in a while :D (why are blogs for? eh?? :D ).
One does miss the place one has lived in, that comfort space, the nook and corner of the room you lived in, the bed you slept on, the level of light in the room at different times of the day,,seasons, and especially the times when you like it most. I guess am a tad bit more attached to the places i lived in, and experience a more than normal amounts of nostalgia when i move on.
It was always like that, even when i was a kid. When we moved form Hyderabad to Anantapur,in my 2nd class, i couldnt get over the pang. It manifested in so many ways, anxiety with losing friends, throwing tantrums with not being able to be in the same bench as your best pal, not wanting to go to school. So much so that my theatrics for not wanting to go to school was quite notorious in the entire street! That trauma haunted me till my 5th class (thankfuly, i can get over that a bit faster now :) ) Before i could settle down, my parents once again had to change houses within city. I can still recall the emotional pangs i felt, on one such anxious occation, the very next day i had my 'unit tests' that too "first" social unit test and it was a sunday (when life looks all the more dreary, ending of a jolly weeked, compared to a saturday or a friday-evening). It was also a "first unit test" of a new year at school, upon that "social", the most intangible subject with no logic and which had only be memorised( years and stuff) and has no relevance (at the age) what so ever to me. My opinion of the subject could have been better, had my teacher imbued that interest or had i been exposed to politics etc via newspaper etc or its relevance to understanding the human condition and how it stands against the comtemporary international political predicaments.
Its the same kind of emotional pang which still haunts me, the disquite with oneself you feel, the helplessness, the dreary life that goes on , that has to go on! It is all that was happy or sad about me. Happy because it "was" happy(read no longer); sad, because it is sad ( and still is ). It reminds me of the days i imagined that someday it will not be the same and that someday things will improve, i will be free from things i cant control. Boringly so, Life and sadness always seems to be of the same flavour you always felt, life is always in someone elses' control, not in yours; its either the bosses or the PG owners or pathetically still, that roommate who wont let you switch on/off the fan to your liking and does not even pay you a salary or serve you food!!! :D Such is life !
Leaving that aside, the pic here was taken during one lazy weekend with my friends with whome i had shared that dwelling and with whome i have been sharing a living space for the last 5.5 years(NITW) and Since, I have left Hyderabad and moved to Bangalore Feb 19th 2007).
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